Sitting here writing this, I honestly have no idea what I’m doing—or why. But I guess I’ll begin at the beginning.
I’m losing my home. There, I said it. It’s not because of anything I did. For the last twenty years, I’ve rented from the same landlord.
Now she’s getting older and wants her son to live closer. So, he’s selling his house and moving into mine. The problem is, the search for a new place has left me stressed, heartbroken, and filled with emotions I can’t even name.
I’ve questioned if God was there. If He was angry with me. I prayed, I made vows, and I spent more time and money than I could afford searching for a home. Living in a small town hasn’t made it easy—finding something within my budget has been one of the hardest experiences of my life.
More than once over the past month, I was sure I was having a heart attack. At one point, after calculating the cost of staying in a hotel, I was looking at a month—or three—in a tent at a campground. It still felt better than going to a homeless shelter.
In the end, I found a home that will be ready at the beginning of November. My current landlord even allowed me to stay an extra month.
“Thankful” doesn’t even begin to describe how I felt. I knew it was time to begin working on the vow I made to God—that if He provided a home, I would become a better woman of faith.
And He did. The new house is completely different from what I’m used to. At 850 square feet, it’s much smaller than anything I’ve ever lived in, and there will be three of us—my mother, her brother, and me. We’re stepping into a new way of life, and for some reason, I felt like I needed to share that.
Actually, I do know the reason. I want there to be a record of this journey. I’d like to say it’s about building followers or a brand, but it’s really not. This is for me—and for anyone else who might find themselves where I am.
I’m 49 years old. Never married. No children. I can’t drive anymore. I’m a woman with a chronic illness, and honestly, a pretty miserable one at times. I’ve spent most of my life taking care of others, first through work and then as a caregiver.
Soon, I’ll be living in town—something I’ve never done before. I’ve gone places, yes, but for the last year or so I’ve felt completely stuck. So this is me, saying out loud: I am going to become unstuck.
